Is the Rain Ever Going to Leave?

I have not posted in a while because there has not been much to say until now- I AM GOING NUTS!!! because of this weather. Am I alone on this people? Does anyone have these same feelings? or am I having a pre-mid life crisis? In all seriousness, it is making me crazy and now just plain depressed. This is one of the many reasons why our little family is discussing expanding our horizons in this large world. Of course, our families are not exactly ecstatic about this new adventure we might undertake, but I really feel like I need a change to keep my sanity. Have you ever felt like that? please give me your info. This is something that has been happening for sometime, but I had always passed it off and recently I have really felt that God has given us such a large, beautiful diverse world and I want to experience it!

It was at our R.S. dinner last night and a woman talked about this very same subject, asking- Do you ever wonder? Do you wonder why you are here, in Vancouver, WA? Do you ever wonder what you are doing here? Do you ever wonder about your dreams? If they will ever happen? Why you have them? And as she is asking these questions I start to ponder about our own situation and I thought this talk was for me. She then went on to say that our dreams may happen soon, they might take some time, but you basically have them for a reason, at least that is what I got from her message. That we all have some part to fill in this world and maybe when we are done with the thing that we have been doing we need to turn the page and start a new chapter. Over all I enjoyed her talk because I needed to hear it and I've never heard anything like it at church before, I found it to be refreshing. These have been deep thoughts by Sarah Swanger.

Today is a special day, Manti is 5 months old! It is so crazy how fast it is going by, I find myself telling me to remember to take the time and cherish the moments because he very well could be my last baby. When I was at the dinner last night there is a younger sister in the ward and she loves to hold my baby, after 3 I do not mind! and she asked for him and I gave him to her and she soaked him all up from the moment she touched him, she would not even eat dinner because she loved holding him so much. She said to me, you get him all night, I don't get that, my husband won't let me have another one because my 2nd is almost in school. I would glance over quite often to check on him and I felt so much for this woman, you could see the love and need she longs for from another child of God. After quite a while he started to get cranky and I grabbed him so he wouldn't distract others and I embraced him with a much more thankfulness for him and I thought of how lucky I am and how special he is to our family. Every one always says he's such a smiley baby and I am so grateful for that, that he brings smiles and joy. I was overall so thankful to witness this woman loving my child and how truly blessed I felt from watching the whole experience.

Newborns have so much love to offer us. This morning I woke up so sick and feel multiple awful feelings, nausea, headaches, body aches, sore throat, etc. etc. I could not even function, I managed to get to the tub, because for some reason it makes my stomach feel better and then I thought, What am I doing? How am I going to get out of this tub? I feel like I am going to pass out. Somehow I managed to build up enough strength to pull myself up and it felt like an out of body experience, it's the weirdest feeling, my body is moving, but I do not feel connected to it in any way. Has that ever happened to any of you? This feeling is what I have always envisioned what being high on drugs was like. This is the reason why I do not understand why people like to use drugs, but I am getting off the subject, and there is a point, I promise. So, while I was sitting there feeling so miserable all I could think about was getting a blessing and so I said a prayer and asked to the Priesthood to help me because I hate the feeling of being sick and not being able to take care of my children, let alone myself and especially when I have to get Eve to the bus stop and work a job that very few of us can do tonight. I took some day quil and passed out for only an hour to wake up to a screaming baby and after a few minutes I realized Geoff was not getting up, so I thought, I have to get Manti myself, so I got up and I felt tremendously better, I love it when that happens, when I picked Manti up it was so sweet, I brought him in our bed and laid with him and he calmed right down and just stared into my eyes like he was comforting me, it was like a conversation with out words. I felt him loving me and telling me everything was going to be OK and after a little while of staring and smiling at me he fell softly to sleep. What a wonderful moment! I have had experiences with sickness like this before, but it still amazes me every time when my prayer is answered. And I know that I can't always have the sickness totally leave, but it is great when you are blessed to over come some of it and manage to function and get on with the necessities of everyday living. I love the Priesthood, I feel so thankful to my Heavenly Father for blessing me like he does, he knows what's important in my life.

ALI WON !!!!

I am so so excited because my favorite people won on the finale tonight. I was so sad when Ali was sent home and when she returned I thought, this girl is going to win. I really admire her strength, endurance and courage. And Bernie was my favorite guy, the sweetest and most caring. I am amazed that he lost so much weight while mostly being at home and obviously that was the way it was meant to be. GOOD JOB TO ALL!

I really have kept up with the show and try to do things that the trainers have them do and I allow myself to weigh in on Tuesdays also. Two weeks ago I got a little bit of a cold or allergy flare up, I really don't know exactly what it was, but I could not work out for most of the week because I was too tired. Let me tell you I hate not being able to work out, especially seeing my body after having a baby and I know I need to be easier on myself. So anyway, last week I was getting back in the swing of things, but taking it light and doing about half my workout. Today was a good day though, because of me not having a lot of energy I wouldn't step on that scale, but I did today and I lost 6 pound, I am very excited. I just hope that now I am gaining the muscle back that I lost during the pregnancy and that I will start burning the fat faster. I am optimistic!

The Biggest Loser

Oh my Gosh! Last night's show of the Biggest Loser was the best ever!!! All I am is encouraged by this show. There were so many highlights that are still racing through my brain. I have to say out right that I am partial to the girls, but in all fairness they all have equally worked just as hard. I was amazed as Roger (the x-football player) said was such conviction and assuredly that he would lose 15 pounds this last week, with out trainers mind you. They all have lost a ridiculous amount of weight so far and they keep plugging along, it is totally inspiring to me. Mark has a little bit of a break down because he feels that there is nothing left to give and he is too stressed out. I do not blame him one bit, he has beat the odds and pushed himself beyond the max. He said something that I thought was so wise, it was something like this...."I show emotion now because I am trying to get over my past issues and discover this whole new me. It is not a weakness to cry, I cry all the time now, this person (as he points to a picture of his old self) never showed emotion and that is why he looked the way he did, I am not the same person at all." I of course cried. So it comes to the weigh ins and Roger goes first and pulls a "15"- the exact number he needed to be the biggest loser in biggest loser history. Then Mark goes up and pulls something like a "12" I seriously don't know how he did it, he really worked for it. Next is Ali, who is my favorite and as soon as she walks up you can tell how skinny she (and Kelly) is just from 1 week, she pulls an "11" AMAZING!!! She has already lost so much, so I was so fired up when I saw her numbers, it was like I was at a base ball game hollering, YEA! ALRIGHT!!! That puts her at 99 pounds lost, the most ever for a girl on the Biggest Loser. And then to top it off, the last to weigh was Kelly, who has done so much and finishes everything no matter how hard it is. She is told to stay above the yellow line she has to have lost 13 pound and I could not believe the scale... "13" is the magic number. I think it is so awesome to see the girls finally beating out the boys after weeks and weeks. I do think they all deserve to win, but my vote would be for Ali.

Little Teether

This was taken earlier today, I thought he was so cute in his Jonny Jumper. It has been a couple weeks now since Manti has been teething and I remembered how much I do NOT miss that stage, especially starting out. He has been pretty good though, but all the slobber and runny nose that comes with it and the biting, oh the biting!!! I feel bad for him because he is to young to grasp for things really, but he loves his hands as you can see. I really hope he soon learns the mechanism of his hands and arms so he can start playing with toys. He is on the brink of rolling over though, so that is good, any day now!

BEFORE

This picture is a little dark, but you get the gist, note her hair. We were heading out to do some kind of errand that day and Eve had to have one of her many purses. She has a large bin in her room exclusively dedicated to all the purses that she owns. I think it's funny because she has at least 5 times as many purses as I do, when I use a purse it gets its 15 min. of fame and then I am done with it, usually. I never really go back to one that I have used before, maybe twice, ever. But hers are all sooo cute, i can't stand to get rid of them.

AFTER

Eve has been bugging me to get a hair cut for some time now and I just didn't have the time or energy to mess with it. This goes to show you how impulsive I am and I guess a little impatient too, I was getting everyone ready for the day and I was sick of combing through that mane and she doesn't like to do it either! so, I decided then and there it is time! This week has been Spring Vacation so I thought I have some time, let's cut that hair and off it came. Eve wanted to it to be really short so I cut it short, but not that short and I thought it turned out pretty dang cute! Her hair has never been that short, even when she got to the scissors that one time, so it is fun to do something new and easy for summer time.

Yum, Cotton Candy!

Geoff, his "boy friend" Eric, Shelle and Bump all went to the opening day Mariner's Game at Safeco in Seattle. It is a bit of a tradition Geoff and his family try to keep. Geoff said that it was raining and snowing and then I felt even better that I chose not to go and they didn't even get any GARLIC FRIES!!! See, that is the difference between my family and his, is that when we want something we get it, no matter what and with his is, if there is too much of a hassle it is not worth it. Seriously! garlic fries are the whole reason to go to the game, well, and of course the baseball uniforms- Come On!!! He was a good Dad though, he brought back cotton candy for Eve and Jackson in their favorite colors.